A Grand Day Out (part 1)

Corinthia Hotel, June 2021

Lola II doesn't approve of how I tell stories. "You can't start there," she says when I begin telling one of the juicy anecdotes of a day spent mucking about. "You have to start at the beginning and tell it in order!" Mr M nodded in agreement. They are a perfect match, both preferring the Long Version of a story while I am sometimes impatient even with the Short Version. Lola II once wanted to tell me about a film, and despite asking for the Short Version I don't think there was a scene left out. I seem to remember an anecdote about Lola II spending a car journey telling mum about a film, and the story lasted as long as the film and almost as long as the journey.

Lola II and I spent a lovely day together in London, and I was made to take photographs and make notes to ensure everything is included. "You used to put much more detail in your blog," Lola II complains. "It was better then. Now there's hardly any of the fun stuff." Well, these blogs don't write themselves, you know. A day spent mucking about can require hours of writing and editing. And I'd like to point out that the last two blog posts that Lola II started to write are still unfinished... but today I'll make an exception, and attempt to write a full account of everything that went on during our day out in London.

The main event was Afternoon Tea at a London hotel, selected by Lola II based on several important criteria: absence of macarons (who on earth likes them?), food selected for flavour rather than appearance (no cakes looking like cars or waistcoats), reasonable rather than outrageous price, and the choux pastries with apricot and pistachio that were on the example menu on the Corinthia hotel's website. Luckily they also appeared on the real menu. [But have I introduced the pastries too soon? They didn't appear until the end of the tea. Forget that I mentioned them.]

We didn't set out all that early, because Lola II had a bit of trouble choosing her outfit. It was a really hot day and we were going to be doing some walking, but we needed to look a little bit smart, and sitting inside air-conditioned hotels can be chilly. In the end Lola II decided to wear a skirt with an item known as the 'clown top' because it has a massive frill down the front, and was bought in a Leamington charity shop when we were looking for something a bit posh but also a bit silly. It was perfect. If I'd had a skirt or light trousers I would have worn those, but I don't, so I had my best work trousers which were too hot for walking, and my Lady Shoes which meant I couldn't have walked far. I carried them in a rucksack so I could change at the hotel and started out wearing shorts and trainers.

[I can't believe I agreed to put everything in. We haven't even left the house and I already need a break.]

Mr M waved us off, and ten seconds later we were back at the front door. Lola II had forgotten to take a mask, I had forgotten to go to the toilet, and then we discovered that Lola II had forgotten her keys. After another false start when we had to go back again for my bag we made it as far as the station. The tube wasn't busy and most people were wearing masks as they should, but it was strange going back underground after such a long time. The local station had been completely rebuilt so was brand new, and Lola II found that routes and lines she used to know well also felt unfamiliar.

First stop in London was John Lewis where I was going to try and select a perfume for myself. We limited ourselves to three 'names' (there are scores to choose from) and sprayed two of each on those cards you're supposed to smell. The assistant was rather taken aback when I described one as smelling like my great aunt, saying rather pitifully, "that's the one that I wear." Lola II tried to reassure her by saying that the great aunt in question was a grand old woman who never married, played golf, drank whisky, smoked like a chimney and lived to be nearly 100. It didn't seem to make the assistant feel any better. 

While I was busy with that assistant, another assistant complimented Lola II on our handbags, which are designer fakes that Lola II bought in Malaysia. The assistant told her that she sells for that designer, at which point Lola II abruptly changed the subject.

My patience is almost as short for shopping as it is for long stories so we took a break in the kitchen department because I wanted a replacement stick blender. [Executive decision - I am NOT describing the choice of the stick blender. It is a Bosch one costing £20.] Then Lola II presented me with a 'blind smelling' test where I whittled down the six fragrances to my two favourites, and went back to the perfume department and applied one to each wrist. That's as far as the shopping went - I know the names of the perfumes I liked, but will probably buy one elsewhere. Or maybe I won't get round to it. Shopping is difficult.

Walking along Oxford Street, Lola II noticed a tourist shop selling sweets including large and small packets of Tim Tam biscuits - a favourite of Mr M's. No prices were on display, but a shop assistant provided this information, which was, of course outrageously high. Lola II went ahead and bought a small packet (because he's worth it). [Again, there is more detail to this story, but I can't in all conscience include it - I nearly left this bit out completely. It's just not interesting enough. People spend time reading my blog and I won't stretch their patience too far.]

We were on our way to the National Gallery, where Lola II has made a hobby of learning about particular paintings and then giving short tours to groups of friends and family. Getting inside the building was quite an undertaking - even if you're standing at the door you have to go away and book a timed ticket online which requires you to register an account and click on links in emails... Standing in the shade of an ambulance  for ages fiddling with mobile phones we were nearly knocked down when the back door suddenly opened. At least we would have been looked after by the paramedic who came out.

The two paintings Lola II showed me were 'Triple Portrait of Cardinal de Richelieu' by Philippe de Champaigne and 'The Beach at Trouville' by Claude Monet. Her commentary added some interesting details [so now I think Lola wouldn't want me to reveal the interesting details - these Long Versions are a minefield] but the main problem we faced was that the National Gallery has instituted a one-way system, presumably for Covid reasons. The second painting was earlier in the circuit than the first, which meant we would have had to go round the whole building twice instead of just going back a bit, except that we asked one of the guides for help and we were allowed to follow her against the traffic - she even took away a barrier for a short cut. Following the whole circuit round after the second painting it was still a very long way to get to the exit.

We were now ready for the main event - our Afternoon Tea. But because it's a Long Version, you'll have to wait until the next episode to hear all about that.

Filling my weeks

In the loft, June 2021

More LTRP activity this week. Olf's Mate and Olf's Mate's Mate turned up after several phone calls to chase them, to remedy the overflow situation for the two tanks in the loft - one for the water and the other for the central heating. I had acquired stains on two patches of ceiling which weren't growing, and our best guess is that these happened due to overflows rather than leaks. The evidence for this is that both overflow pipes had sections of uphill gradient, and contained sections with very dodgy joints. They took a morning to put in new pipes, and while they were at it they replaced the insulation around the water tank and gave me a new lid for the heating tank.

Ilf embarked on another phase of the LTRP, decorating the main bedroom and finishing a few bits in the shower room. He manages to cause problems whenever he comes - in past visits he has broken a toilet seat and a lampshade, but this time he managed to lose my visitor parking permit, which we think was stolen from his car. On the plus side, he does work hard and usually does a good job (except for wallpapering). I cancelled the parking permit and ordered a replacement, and the kind person on the end of the phone waived the £5 admin fee because the permit was only valid for six more weeks before I'd have to buy another.

I was planning to take advantage of having a second person in the house to order a self-assembly wardrobe, as I thought it might be helpful when it comes to any large or heavy parts. It was delivered in time but in the end I didn't get the opportunity to build it while Ilf was there. It took the whole weekend to build on my own, looks pretty good and fits the space I'd set aside for it. I only screwed one part on the wrong way round and luckily didn't need help with anything heavy. Now I have a full car-load of polystyrene and cardboard packaging to take to the tip, along with empty paint pots, a load of cassette tapes, a broken keyboard and all the usual stuff from the garden.

Since stopping my two days at the Diabetes Centre my weeks are still full because I've tried to ramp up the time I spend on Mr MXF's work, and I've done some more volunteering for Lola II. Mr MXF's work is intensely frustrating, and despite setting aside full days I can only manage about four hours before I want to throw the computer out of the window. I'm not sure I've made any progress in the last month, but Mr MXF assures me that a time will come when it all makes sense, so I'm hoping he's right.

We had a small Covid scare before Lola II was due to deliver her course, as she had a sniffle and a runny nose. That very day the BBC had reported that new Delta variant produced symptoms resembling a cold, so although she came up negative on a lateral flow test she went off to a proper test centre, just in case. That was negative too, but I still had to think hard about whether I even wanted to risk the possibility of a cold. I did go there in person in the end (and escaped without infection). Supporting the IT on the course was quite straightforward, although the microwave in the house had to be put out of action because turning it on it knocks out the internet. The internet went down anyway at exactly 4 p.m. and threw us out of the Zoom meeting - just after Lola II had thanked everyone and they were filling in their evaluation forms.

I stayed an extra day with Lola II and Mr M because we had planned a Day Out In London. You will be learning much, much more about this next time...

Meeting in person

View from Bredon Hill, May 2021

Lots going on as usual. In vaccination news, as I suspected, the first wave of vaccinations is complete and the clinic is only opening on a couple of days a week. I managed to work one shift but it wasn't busy, and I had another shift booked but it was cancelled. Managers have been negotiating to keep the clinic open by making it available for public booking, and I think that's going to happen. I am 80% confident that I will be paid at the end of June...

The Commonwealth Games 2022 continues to loom over the residents of my little cul de sac. We had a meeting in the pub garden, and a committee was formed which will liaise with the District Council and the Games Committee to make sure that residents are considered when plans are made and contracts awarded. I still haven't made my official response on the Council website where planning permission is being sought, but I have seen some of the plans and the discussion at the meeting was very illuminating. 

It is anticipated that 2,500 spectators will attend two sessions per day for the nine days of competition. In addition there will be a media and broadcast centre, security, and car parking needing to be allocated for spectators as well as officials, staff and competitors. The current proposal allows for the erection of large spectator stands that will extend over the pavement and into the road and displace about half the residents' parking for up to three months, as well as blocking two of the three entrances to the park.

The main issues are the proposed three months of disruption for the sake of nine days competition, and the fact that residents are not mentioned when it comes to parking allocation. Some people are also concerned that the entrances to the park that will remain open are on the far side and there isn't a safe road crossing. So the committee would like to prioritise remaining parking space for residents by identifying those who particularly need to park close by - people who can't walk too far or perhaps families with small children - and bookable spaces for loading and unloading. I should be fine on account of having a garage.

There has been quite a bit of socialising since restrictions were lifted to allow meeting indoors. I continue to enjoy the company of the Buddhists, and we met in person on a May Bank Holiday weekend for a walk near Evesham. The weather was absolutely perfect, as it has been most of the time since the cold, wet weekend when Lola II and I visited Malvern. The sun also shone on another get together in person to say farewell to one of my badminton tribe, who is moving away. I had both my work leaving parties - low key lunch in the Diabetes Centre with the diabetes team, and pizza with the Dietitians. And Christmas finally arrived with a weekend visiting the friends who were going to host Christmas 2020. Presents were exchanged and Christmas pudding was eaten, only five months late.

And there's more news from the Buddhists. Normally when someone decides to become a Buddhist, as I did a year ago, there is a ceremony. Because we are a small satellite of the Birmingham group, previously this has been celebrated in Birmingham. We are trying hard to establish ourselves as a viable independent group, and one of the ways to do this is to try and hold the ceremony locally rather than in Birmingham.

What with one thing and another, it hasn't been possible to meet for the ceremony - other groups have been doing them online, but we thought we would wait until we could meet in person. This ought to have been straightforward, but while we have been online the church hall where we used to meet is being rented out to a daytime nursery. We want to continue to offer people the option to stay online as well as meeting in person, so we went there to test out the technology. While it was a resounding success in respect of laptop, projector, mobile phones and data plan, the actual environment has changed from a calm, green countryside hall where you can look through the windows at fields with horses or cows, to a busy room full of toys, games, paints, books and cabinets with clutter on every available surface.

So unless the nursery is prepared to clear a lot more space for us, we now need a different venue for the ceremony, and possibly also for our group when it starts meeting in person again. And, depending upon where that is, we need to start considering acquiring the tech that we'll need and trying it out, all before the date we've decided upon in July. Normally I would be happy to manage the whole tech project, but on this particular day I'll be fully occupied with more spiritual matters. The hunt is on for a suitable venue with just a month to go.

p.s. I'm not sure whether to be glad or sorry that the wisteria lives on...

Wisteria: alive! May 2021

Rain and tofu in Malvern

Lolas with Elgar, Malvern, May 2021

'New Normal' has begun - Lola II and I have been on holiday. We made it all the way to Malvern, only 14 months after the trip was supposed to happen.

Not without incident, though. Lola II's car has been playing up for a while, refusing to start unless a magical incantation is performed (and the accelerator is pumped). My car, usually so reliable, had a bit of a fit just as I drove into the town and started beeping an error on the dashboard, coughing and refusing to go faster than 30 mph. I called my garage friends back in Leamington and told them what the dashboard said, and they reassured me that the car was still safe to drive, and the fault would need diagnosing using the computer-aided diagnostic system that all garages use. So we ignored all of that and had lunch with Mr M before sending him south to visit his mum and then stay at Lola Towers until we returned.

From the comfortable Airbnb accommodation I called a local garage who seemed very friendly and agreed that if I called in first thing next day they could at least find out more about the problem, and if it was a quick fix they could probably sort it out on the same day. So that's what I did - leaving Lola II asleep I arrived at the garage where they diagnosed a problem with the spark plugs and/or leads and/or coil pack. I formulated all sorts of backup plans involving Mr M coming to fetch us and me leaving the car and coming back for it by train, but changing the plugs seemed to fix it and I drove off, only for the fault to recur before I'd reached the end of the road. After changing the other two parts as well and driving round the block to double check, I got the all clear. 

Lola was up and ready for action when I got back so we went out for breakfast and then into town, where we visited the very helpful Tourist Information Centre, wandered around various quaint shops, and followed part of a walking trail around the town. Unfortunately the day was wet - it didn't rain all the time, but there were regular showers and it was cold. Despite this we learned about the Malvern Spring Water and Water Cure businesses, the Lea and Perrins Worcestershire Sauce business, and the various eminent personages associated with Malvern including Edward Elgar, C. S. Lewis, George Bernard Shaw and Charles Darwin. And there was hot chocolate and cake, of course.

On Saturday we finally managed to attend the tofu cookery course that we'd booked in January 2020 and had to put off at least twice. Before Covid there would have been six people on the course but it had to be reduced to just four, and we weren't allowed to share any food except what the teacher (Lizzy) cooked. We cooked and tasted different types of tofu cooked and flavoured in many ways - sweet and sour, Mexican, Italian, Indian, Middle Eastern, soy and ginger, braised, fried, scrambled, and fish-flavoured using seaweed then battered and fried. We tasted that last one with chips and peas at the end of the day, and it was better than the real fish and chips I'd had in a fancy pub the night before. All the dishes we cooked had to be taken away with us, and there were lots! You can see all the plastic tubs in the background of the picture below.

The weather was still not good on Sunday, so we decided not to head for a walk on the hills but went to an English Heritage site instead - Witley Court and Gardens, which was one of the most interesting I've come across. It started out as a Jacobean mansion, and was enlarged several times by subsequent owners to reach the peak of opulence between 1850 and 1885. It remained as a lavish stately home until it caught fire in 1937, after which the owner deemed it too expensive to repair, sold off all the furniture and artefacts that weren't damaged by the fire, and then sold off the house and land as well. It has remained a ruin except for the gardens and the restored fountain but there is quite a bit of photographic and presumably documented information about what it looked like and who lived and worked there in its heyday.

It has a very similar atmosphere to all the Roman and Greek remains I've visited, or the monasteries destroyed during the Reformation, because you're essentially asked to imagine what the various rooms might have looked like based on not much more than brick walls. In this case, however, it's much more recent history: we know for sure which rooms were used for what, and there are photographs. We joined a guide who talked about the life and wages of the servants below stairs and took us through the service areas. It was all really interesting, and we would have also had a lovely walk around the grounds except that I got really cold sitting outside for lunch (inside was forbidden) and then it started to rain.

Our first 'proper' holiday since the pandemic started, and a great success. Here's to infection rates dropping, lockdown lifting and more of the same.

Coasting to retirement

June 2021

Welcome to the first day of Lolatastic Life! My fourth career, after Engineering, Disability IT, and then Dietetics. 

Engineering was a poor choice of degree, although I made many friends who are still some of the best people I know and frequently appear within these virtual pages (including Mr MXF, CERNoise, the Buddhist formerly known as Sas, two of the J's in Family JJL+J). It did give me a start in IT, which I followed up with the job at RNIB, probably the best job I've ever had, before the switch to Dietetics.

I had an old friend from school who had similarly decided later in life to train as a Physiotherapist. When he found out about my plan to become a Dietitian he wrote me a long message that essentially told me not to do it, for the exact reasons that have now led me to move on. "You'll find it too frustrating," he wrote. "Nobody will listen to your ideas, and even if they do you won't be able to change anything." He was right, but that's not the whole story. I seem to have an attention span that will not extend beyond seven years in a job.

So now I have what they call a 'Portfolio Career'. I'm vaccinating (yes, that's started up again), working for Mr MXF, helping out with mum and dad, doing quite a lot with the Buddhist group, still working on the LTRP, and I've just signed up to be considered as a volunteer for the Commonwealth Games in 2022, ideally for the badminton at the NEC or the lawn bowls on my doorstep (but if I'm picked the role could be anywhere). It does feel a little like the definition of career as a verb rather than the noun.

So here we are. I hope you like the new design - I've thrown it together in a bit of a hurry so it may change again. According to my web reporting tools, readership is currently down to single figures, so I don't think anyone is going to be objecting any time soon.

Welcome to Lolatastic Life!