Farewell Lola Towers

The wonderful and perfect Lola Towers, August 2026

Before I left there were a succession of 'last times' - with the local Buddhist group, the Birmingham Buddhists and many other friends. My last U3A walk opportunity was cancelled due to the heat, and my last U3A board games opportunity was also cancelled due to the two leaders being busy elsewhere. I did manage to have lunch with UJ, who has just returned from Ukraine where she has spent most of her time since moving out about 9 months ago. She has persuaded her parents to apply for visas at last now that conditions at home are so much worse, and they may look for a place in Leamington.

Removal was delayed by a day, and while I thought this would give me some time to have a break I really did need that day for organising. I labelled everything with its destination room, sorted out all the keys (and only found two that I don't think belong to anything), separated out and labelled the things I didn't want them to take (like cleaning gear), and the things I agreed to leave for the new occupants. 

Then the team arrived bright and early, with boxes and tape and paper and bubble wrap, saw how organised everything was and asked me if I had a military background. Four of them took three and a half hours to pack and load everything I own into their truck, which also included disassembling a wardrobe and my desk right down to component parts. They went off and I took a break to have lunch then started cleaning, which took me four hours. When I was ready to go it turned out to be surprisingly easy to leave the house behind, and I arrived at Maternal Manor too tired to unload the car. I went to bed early, but couldn't sleep until the early hours, even though I was physically exhausted.

Next morning the truck arrived at Maternal Manor with just two of the removal men, one of whom was tasked with the unenviable job of reassembling the wardrobe and the desk that he'd reduced to matchsticks the previous day. He didn't do too badly; only a few unimportant pieces left over although one of the shelves in the wardrobe is the wrong way round which will bug me forever.

Now mum and I are completely surrounded by boxes, and it will take quite a while to get everything out and in its proper place. We spent an entire morning sorting through the towels and bedding to decide what to keep from our joint collections. The item that always causes the most grief - my wireless printer - proved impossible to connect until I noticed that mum's printer cable could be used to set it up wirelessly via a USB cable, which sounds counterintuitive but I followed the instructions and it worked beautifully. It can't have been too bad a move if the worst thing so far is the stupid printer.

So that's that, the end of an era - more than 25 years in Leamington and I'm now a Londoner again, back living in the road where I lived throughout my school days.

Nearly there

Another from the Escher exhibition, London, August 2026

I had to sign some stuff in person with a witness and so did Lola II, but at last I was notified that the Compliance Department had given me the all clear and it was safe to exchange contracts with an agreed completion date. When exchange actually happened I was temporarily overcome with grief. This is actually going ahead, and after nearly 25 years I'm going to have to hand over to someone else my beautiful and perfect house, in its wonderful location, and move away. I can't take it back now.

Notifying institutions and changing addresses takes a surprisingly long time, and some accounts are very much easier to change than others. My broadband supplier was the least reasonable; car insurance costs more where I'm going; TV licensing have already worked out my refund. I've done about half the work on this. I've also been in touch with a few people that I'd like to meet before I go.

Maternal Manor is prepared for removals day as best it can be; all excess furniture has now left the premises and we've done quite a lot to clear cupboards and drawers. We haven't touched the kitchen yet - that will be a job for the first month after I move in and is likely to be challenging due to the amount of stuff I have and the kitchen already being full of mum's stuff. Then I went off to play badminton with the Oldsters, only to find that I got the day wrong and the hall was full of girls in leotards doing gymnastics. I have continued my search for a 'normal' badminton club and have one lined up for September that looks good.

In the middle of this there was an interlude at a party thrown by Lola II and Mr M, called Desert Island Desserts, where desserts were served that had been identified by guests as the one they would choose for their desert island (if they could only keep one). The desserts were delicious but my state of mind wasn't robust enough for the number of people and the amount of social chitchat required, so I had to take frequent breaks away from the throng.

Back home then, and back to the task in hand, trying to rid the house of even more unnecessary household items. A breakthrough came when someone agreed to take all the ring binders, lever arch files and plastic pockets that I have liberated from all my university and dietetic notes in the loft, and there are A LOT of them. I must remember to keep just a couple because I never want to have to buy any ever again. 

The annual national bowling competition began and I realised that I hadn't received my resident's pass to get me through security at the end of the road. They are saving money by employing volunteers instead of a security company, and the volunteers are so much stricter than the professionals were. They gave me a hard time about not having a pass but eventually agreed to arrange one for me, then challenged the man from the removal company who came to give me a quote, and wouldn't let my friend through at all when he came with his dog to go for a walk with me. The pass hadn't arrived by late afternoon so I wandered over to ask again, only to find that one of the security volunteers was my ex-boss from the Dietetics department at the hospital.

I have been surprised by my excitement at the partial solar eclipse. I think I have missed all previous opportunities to witness a solar eclipse, either because it was cloudy, I was otherwise engaged, in the wrong part of the world or who knows what. But I made a makeshift viewer out of a shoe box and had a good time projecting the image through a pinhole onto my wall.

The end of the week brought the British Heart Foundation van to collect some of the larger items of furniture that aren't going with me. They rejected a few things that I then took to the recycling shop at the tip. In the evening someone who described himself as a 'forager and chef' came to take away my fridge/freezer. When I retrieved all the documentation for it I discovered that it was bought in July 2000 - 26 years ago, and apart from cracks in a couple of the shelves it was still working perfectly. Then a local couple came to take the television and sound bar, which was quite a challenge. I had kept the box and the instructions but it was much heavier and more unwieldy than it looked and took three of us more than an hour to package it all up - they needed to make two trips. 

Just one more week now.

Bites, a photograph, and more bites

Adhisthana, May 2026

I've been on retreat again, hence the long blog silence. It was one of the more intense types of retreat that's for people who've asked for ordination, but I found it a little easier than previously except for the temperature. The building is a bit too small for the number of retreatants (a new, larger centre is being constructed) so it's always useful to be able to go outside, and this can be a little dismal in the normal Welsh weather. So hot weather should have been very welcome, except it brought horseflies which have the most painful and itchiest bite I've ever experienced. After six of those I didn't want to go outside any more. There was insect repellent which I used liberally on the couple of long walks I did, but on one particular day I needed three cold showers and didn't want to keep putting on the repellent in between. None of us packed clothes for two weeks of stifling humid heat, and I dreamed of coming home to pick up cooler shirts.

I came home via Adhisthana, the retreat centre where I do my volunteering; it's on the way, and there were a couple of people I'd arranged to meet there. As an added bonus - and I can't tell you how exciting this is - I had my photo taken. I'd been asked to write a couple of sentences about my experience of volunteering that could go in next year's programme, and they wanted a photo to go with it. One of the community there does all the graphic design and his photographs of people are amazing, so it was thrilling to join that elite group! And he didn't seem to mind that I was a sweaty mess wearing a dirty T-shirt.

Coming home I was looking forward to my cooler house and no horseflies, but the house wasn't that cool and I was immediately devoured by mosquitos. I've been taking my time catching up on what's been going on while I've been away, and there's been another offer on my house. I've had a chat with Mr Celery and we're going to ask both the potential buyers for 'best and final' offers, after which I'll accept one of the two and take it from there.

An offer

Wales, September 2025

Nameless Man fixed the plug socket; I managed to clean all the downstairs windows (which I thought would be the best thing to do to improve the look of the place) and there have been five house viewings. Mr Celery, as I suspected, is very prone to error but so far I have corrected the mistakes that I have noticed, none of which have been particularly egregious, but he managed to sneak one into the printed brochure by adding the excited statement "NO ONWWARD CHAIN." 

One offer came in at £75k below the guide price, and now a much more realistic offer has materialised along with one further request for a viewing. I filled in a form and went to the office of a solicitor just in case I needed conveyancing sooner rather than later. They say I must complete a second form stating the source of the funds I used to purchase my house 25 years ago - it's the Law. I continue to range around the house picking out things to get rid of that escaped previous purges.

One such find is a trove of letters hiding under past family calendars that I'd kept, and some more letters in a box in the loft that had travelled with me, unopened, through all house moves since, it turns out, 1975. That was when I seemingly started keeping every single letter I received, initially birthday greetings from faraway relatives and letters from family when I was on school trips and holidays abroad. In later years it included letters from school friends and then university friends when we all dispersed to our various jobs and travel. I'm scanning or reading most of them before putting them into recycling - it's difficult to prioritise this job over more pressing matters but it's intriguing.

In other news - there isn't anything interesting. I went to the funeral of the mother of my longest-standing friend from junior school - two years ago I was there for his father's funeral, and one year ago it was dad's. I went to Maternal Manor where we applied for mum's Blue Badge to be renewed, booked a Bulky Waste Collection with the Council for the sofabed and dismantled wardrobe, and I took lots of measurements of rooms and furniture. I took my new collaborative games to the U3A board games group, and as expected they didn't take to them especially well. I have officially handed over the finances of my Buddhist group, so now I think I'm free of any official responsibility there.

And there has been badminton and Buddhism and cinema and Muscles the Personal Trainer, who is aware of my plans to move away and says that before I leave he is aiming for me to be able to dead-lift my own weight. I started eighteen months ago at 20kg (just the bar without any weights on it) and I'm up to 50kg, so nearly there. And my core strength and balance are great. It's astonishing.

Going live

Maternal Manor, May 2026

My estate agent's representative, whom I'm going to call Mr Celery (because he's tall, thin, and very Seller-y) told me that he appreciates that I am not in a tearing hurry, that I now need a solicitor, and that I won't regret placing the sale with his company. The sales board is up outside the house and we went through the brochure together to eliminate the spelling mistakes, so we were ready for going live on Friday. People keep asking how I feel. At the moment it's still just a project I'm working on, and I'm not looking forward to the time when it sinks in and I become very sad indeed to be leaving.

One issue that still needs addressing is a broken electrical socket in the bedroom. "I can deal with this," I thought, as I identified the fuse in the fuse box, turned off the power to the sockets, unscrewed the wires from the front plate and took the broken back box off the wall. After trips to B&Q, Wickes and the wonderful Action 21 I could only find replacement boxes that had screws in a different place, and I hate it when I experience this sort of helpless incompetence. Luckily, Nameless Man is happy to help out, although our combined busy timetables mean he can't get started until later this week.

My last session with the Diabetes Prevention Programme coach has taken place, although she says I can ask my GP to be re-referred if I think it will help. I may just do that. Due to some relaxation of my willpower during the volunteering in the retreat kitchen I now have to take my eating habits a bit more seriously, and have laid down a couple of new intentions for the next few weeks. I can safely say that this will be No Fun At All.

Mr Celery has already found me two people who want an early viewing before the date that we had set for the main house viewing event. I finished all the weeding, mowed the lawn again, and the main thing remaining is to clean a few windows to make it look that bit more attractive. That was the last day before the massive heatwave that we're experiencing arrived, so I'm glad I managed to get nearly everything done before we all melted.

Then I headed south to see mum and to supervise the transition from copper wire internet and POTS (plain old telephone system) to fibre broadband. There was an engineer who came into the house and another who climbed the telephone pole and strung the new wire to the house. But my suspicions were raised when the engineer said he couldn't set up two wired phones on the new router. He left an extra telephone box and advised me to contact the company to activate the second phone, and told me many things that turned out not to be true. So I had a very difficult conversation with the company which has left me regretting my choice of supplier despite the very competitive price, because we can't have two wired phones on the new system after all, despite having been assured that we could.

Mum has been very flexible and adaptable, and has accepted stoically the loss of her usual phone number for about two weeks (I really hope that the company hasn't misled me about this too). She has one landline phone with a new (hopefully temporary) number and is carrying her mobile phone around with her. Lola II and I are working on getting her a couple of digital cordless phones that are relatively easy to use, and we'll see how things go.

Nearly there

April 2026

So I am living two parallel lives at the moment, volunteering at my favourite retreat centre at the same time as negotiating with the Estate Agent over the brochure that they're putting together. They agreed with my comments about the pictures in the draft brochure and Sister D kindly helped me to re-write the whole thing. The next draft I received still had significant problems, so I'll be meeting the estate agent in person to try and get it all sorted out ready for the date we've agreed to go live. I really need to find a suitable name for this very keen salesman who seems to pay very little attention to detail (Mr M may be able to come up with something...) This does worry me, but at least I'm aware of it before we start.

At the retreat centre I'm working in the kitchen on the menus for people with food allergies and intolerances. It's nice to be back and I've been made very welcome. One person has such a restricted diet that, in combination with other people's restrictions, they're all getting no veg beyond carrot, broccoli, peppers, spring greens and kale, which doesn't sound too bad until you've cooked carrot, potato and ginger soup and steamed or roasted broccoli, carrot and peppers for their two meals a day and then have to do much the same again next day. Roasted veg, steamed veg, soups - I even decided to sculpt decorative carrots just to try and make it look more interesting, even though the taste was the same.

I had two days off when I had to come home to do what's needed there, not least because the phone signal at the retreat centre is a bit poor and I needed to make some heavy duty calls. One of these was to try and find a broadband and landline deal for mum, because her current provider is removing the landline option that she needs. Running the phones via WiFi should be as straightforward as plugging them into the router with an adapter, until you consider that the phones she uses are not in the same room as the router. I think we have a solution; we will only find out for sure when installation commences next week.

In GRUHI news, the bricks are gone! The remainder were collected by a lovely woman who's going to make some sort of platform for the water butt on her allotment. She even volunteered to take the ones she didn't want to the tip for me. The clean up operation on the garden is nearly complete, inside is looking good too with just a couple more things that I can get on top of when I get back from the retreat centre.

A bit too much

Just a cow I met, September 2025

At Maternal Manor I started to tackle the water leak issue by contacting Thames Water via their Chat facility to find out how serious the problem is based on the readings from the water meter. After 90 minutes and three different agents who ignored my specific question I was passed to someone new who just gave me the answer I wanted. During the chat I not only took mum out to visit a friend but also went up into the loft to see what was there and how much space there might be - only to discover that there is a distinct noise of trickling water coming from the tank. Lola II nobly volunteered to contact a plumber. The kitchen trench is probably dry enough to be filled in now so there's a whole lot more work involved in getting two quotes for the full kitchen refurbishment so we can go back to the insurer.

I finally did it - I contacted one of the estate agents and started the process of selling Lola Towers.  I spent a full day making the house ready for photos - mowing the lawn, a trip to the tip with the remains of the garden table, putting everything out of sight into cupboards and the garage. It was all tidy enough for photos, but there will need to be a whole lot more cleaning before I'll be happy for people to see it close up. And it was utterly exhausting. 

The estate agent rep (who is very enthusiastic) took photos and measurements, next day someone else did some drone photography, and another person came to complete the Energy Performance Certificate and floor plan. The draft brochure for the house arrived from the estate agent, and while it does look very nice I've got quite a lot of work to do in tidying it up and suggesting different wording for the worst bits. Meanwhile someone else came and took more surplus bricks away, I touched up the paint on the Auditorium walls and the hall ceiling, and I remain exhausted.

A weekend with friends in Nottingham provided some respite, except it meant less time at home for the jobs that remain. A blood donation didn't go well and left me with a very painful arm, and a Buddhist film night at my house was so undersubscribed that I invited Nameless Man (who's not a Buddhist) to join us just to make it worth showing the film. That was probably the last public screening in my Auditorium. And a friend from Ireland came to stay on the way to a retreat. She is in the process of being diagnosed as having coeliac disease and has been pretty ill with it, so it's important that my host duties include keeping her away from gluten. At least that's within my skillset.

It's all a bit much, really. It's to be expected because in April I really cut down on my commitments but in May I didn't hold back, and I've ended up with a bit too much to do. But I'm keeping myself steady and focussed, trying to prioritise the urgent things and not stress about the rest.

Local news of local people

Just an alpaca I met, October 2025

Following on from my last post, it turns out that UJ had confused the English words for vinyl records (which she didn't want), and the turntable (which she did). In the end she took the amp as well as the record player, and I delivered them to her temporary home along with the vases and lamps she had left with me, and some other random items of hers that I found. To store them she opened the garage which was stuffed so full that my precious turntable had to be balanced carefully on the top of a pile of other goods. I am trying not to think about the likelihood that it will be usable when she finally gets round to having a place to set it up.

Which left me with about 120 LP records, so I took them round to a second-hand record shop in Leamington which advertised that they would buy record collections for cash. They phoned me later in the day to offer me £120 for them, which I happily took. Together with my eBay activity, I have made more than £660 (and 12 Oaks) so far.

I'm focusing on just two areas at the moment - the garden and the Auditorium, where the water stains have faded now that the weather has improved. Jlf 6 painted over one area with stain blocker paint, and then I found another patch and took on the painting myself for a change instead of employing someone else. This is mainly due to the time factor, but actually there's an awful lot more to do and I'm thinking about getting help in just to get it done in a reasonable amount of time. Painting is quite a satisfying activity and I haven't messed it up or spilt paint on anything important so far (but it's not yet finished).

The garden is jolly hard work. Clearing all the paving of moss and weeds is backbreaking, and then there are the bricks. One person came round and took five of them away, which is lovely for them and five fewer for me but my estimate was that there were at least sixty more. I was talking about this to a friend who works in a school, and she looked thoughtful for a moment and then said that she might be able to help. Next day she texted that she would take them all, but it turned out there were far more than my estimate - after she'd taken all that would fit in her van there are still about a hundred left.

Before Christmas I went to a LETS social gathering where I met a couple who mentioned that they were looking to move somewhere nearer to the town centre. so I invited them to come round. I reminded them of the invitation recently, they came last week and delighted in the house and its location. The chances of this working out in terms of timing and finances are slim, but you never know. They are struggling so much with de-cluttering that they are employing a professional Declutterer to help them - who knew such people existed? I still haven't contacted the estate agents again and am definitely feeling some emotional resistance at the moment.

I'll end with two contrasting aspects of Leamington. First news item: a man's body was found in the river in the park at the end of my road on Wednesday, and a murder investigation has begun. A police flyer has come through my door asking for witnesses to anything suspicious on the night of the crime. 

Second news item: on Friday I went to a fundraising gig for the Peace Festival at a venue right next to the location of the murder, where three local acts were performing. I'd seen Benji Kirkpatrick before at Temperance; the second band (Satsangi) included one of my Buddhist friends, and the third act was a DJ - Dr Trippy - who is the husband of my LETS friend who also sings in the local choir I've been to see. One of the organisers of the gig and the Peace Festival is another LETS person who also helps to run the Repair Cafe...

Three other Buddhist friends were in the audience as well as a whole lot of other LETS acquaintances (including the couple who had visited my house earlier in the day), and I even recognised and said hello to the man who sold me my home music system. I was quite pleased that I not only worked out why he seemed familiar, but even remembered his name. It was a terrific gig. It's been a good week. No wonder I'm feeling some reluctance to start the formal process of moving away.

Mainly snow and water

Lake Tueda, Meribel Mottaret, February 2026

The skiing holiday was another good one, affected only slightly by one of our party (P) falling on the third day. Sitting on the piste, he was in immense pain around the left shoulder and thought it was dislocated; the paramedic on skis (Damien) thought it probably wasn't. Damien called an ambulance which arrived very promptly and delivered the patient to the local medical centre, where an X-ray confirmed a break right through the humerus just below the shoulder. P came back in a brace along with industrial strength French painkillers, including opium powder. We all hoped he would start wearing a smoking jacket and writing romantic poetry, but no, he just winced and went a bit grey and silent whenever the shoulder was disturbed. There followed some discussion with the insurance company, who finally came up with a plan to fly him home, accompanied by his wife, on the same day that the rest of us came home by train.

Aside from that notable event, the rest of the holiday went very well. In advance it had looked as though the weather would be very bad, but actually the clouds came in and it started to snow only on the last day. I went out with JW anyway despite the difficult conditions, and enjoyed his graceful dives into a couple of soft snow drifts. It started to snow again when it was lunchtime and we were just next to a restaurant; when we were ready to carry on the snow had stopped, so that was perfect.

One afternoon I decided to stay out a bit longer than my companions, and confirmed the fact that I have absolutely no sense of direction or navigational skills. I planned a route that would definitely not take me into an adjacent valley, only to find myself in the adjacent valley on a slope that was challenging to say the least. I managed to get myself back, but skied for about an hour longer than was sensible.

Back home I had to return to all the aspects of life that disappear on holiday. I took mum for a CT scan, which she found very helpful and I found very interesting. My main role was translating and transmitting whatever the various clinicians say to mum because they a) mumble and/or speak very fast b) use jargon c) have strong accents and d) don't look at her when they talk. 

At Lola Towers there is still water penetrating through my front wall. Glf (current favourite of all my tradesmen) came and had a look and we have a plan that includes contacting Severn Trent Water to see if it might be a leak around the water meter. The third estate agent visited; his estimate comes somewhere between the first and the second. Before I put it on the market I have decided to get the front painted, if it ever stops raining. I'm still waiting for a decorator to give me a date before the end of February to do some of the interior painting that's needed, and if we get on OK I'll ask if he'll do the outside work too. If not, estate agent 2 gave me a possible lead.

On my travels I encounter an heirloom

Tomb of King John, Worcester Cathedral, January 2026

I've been trying for a while to post a blog entry every six days. A few things get in the way - making preparations for two trips at once was definitely one of those things. I am currently at Maternal Manor for a two week stay - we both survived one week last time I stayed, so I'm taking that as a win and going for the 'double or quits' option. I exaggerate, there really has been minimal friction so far. After just under two weeks I'll be going skiing without returning home in between, which is why packing was so complicated. At the moment I believe I've only left behind my 'ordinary' gloves (I did remember to bring ski gloves and fingerless mittens), and the power supply to my laptop. This was the more concerning item but I think I'll be able to do everything on mum's PC, which is actually a higher spec machine than mine. Both my laptop and my phone really need to be updated, but the thought of it may put me off for some time yet.

Anyway. I met the second Estate Agent representative, and the cat is very much among the pigeons because he had a very different opinion on both the marketing approach and the price. The difference is so significant that I now need to do my own research - isn't that what Estate Agents are supposed to do for you? - and potentially contact a third company. There are many to choose from in Leamington so it's not a problem, and luckily there's no hurry or deadline.

My tour guide in front of Worcester Guildhall

A very long time ago I attended an auction of delights in aid of the Birmingham Buddhist Centre's fundraising appeal, and I won a guided tour of Worcester. I was hoping to bring a particular friend along, but her health deteriorated significantly so we had to cancel. Then Lola II was going to come with me, but finding a suitable day was quite difficult, and then on the actual date agreed we were on our way when my car broke down. The tour finally took place at the weekend, with just me and my guide. It was cold but didn't rain until the very end, and I enjoyed it a great deal. After my guide left me I went back to the cathedral for a proper look around, but I wouldn't mind going back to Worcester for a proper weekend break.

So down at Maternal Manor for two weeks means a few things. Odd jobs around the house, but also doing more clearing out - it is quite astonishing how much dad managed to accumulate, and mum and I have had a few sessions on the easier stuff (photocopied books, notes for lectures - not difficult to consign to the recycling box). The difficult stuff is dad's personal effects - identity cards, passports, school books, diplomas, drawings. I asked Sister D and Lola II to come round so we could go through it together, and it nearly worked, except Lola II was ill and couldn't be there in person so we stuck her on Zoom while the three of us sifted through everything. It has made a difference, but there is still quite a lot more to do, but luckily no particular urgency at the moment.

Mum and I have been plotting how to get rid of some of the bigger items, some of which may be worth something but mostly not, we thought. Charities will collect saleable furniture for free, and the Council will come and collect three items in any condition, but we've got to get them outside and protected from rain. I think it would probably be worth waiting for better weather, but the first targets are the sofabed with the disintegrated foam mattress, the huge wooden wardrobe that still needs emptying and will have to be dismantled to get it down the stairs, and the oval kitchen table that dad made but forty years on is now not all that stable and surplus to requirements.

There is also a big bookcase that mum thought might be worth 50 or 60 quid - I was sceptical, having had such trouble giving away my bookcase for nothing, but that one was Ikea and this one definitely wasn't. I took a couple of photos and some measurements, and ran it past Lola II and Sister D to see what they thought, and Lola II ran it past ChatGPT. Oh me, oh my, after quite a bit of this and that, it turns out to be a genuine Swedish design classic worth several THOUSAND pounds. Which was, to say the least, a surprise. Mum then mentioned that yes, she had inherited it from someone who had definitely furnished her house in style. So now we have the very welcome task of having to actually sell it, which is quite a lot harder than asking the Council or the British Heart Foundation to come and take it away for nothing.

Visiting and being visited

Lola Towers, January 2026

It's been very cold indeed. Lola II and I forgot that she really shouldn't visit Lola Towers during the winter, so she enjoyed my new heated blanket while also serving as encouragement to my ongoing efforts at shedding surplus stuff. With her help I took down quite a few items from the loft, but the most excellent service she provided was to thread the lace back into the cuff of my Wellington boot, which took a very long time. She also modelled various items that I was offering to particular people, sang songs in the car with me when we were held up on the motorway for an hour, made tea, and was generally in charge of Morale.

I continued to attempt to give away my huge bookcase, with several enquiries leading to nothing, but finally someone who was serious took it away. I was expecting its removal to reveal horrors in the wall behind it but nothing horrific emerged, so that's one bullet dodged. I imagine that many people are not looking to spend much money in January, so I'll be trying to sell the few items of value that I have in February or March.

Trips I have made - one to the north where we ate pizza and congratulated one another on progress made in various aspects of life; one to mum where I feel I was helpful by way of Organising; one to Oxford with Sister D which was quite cold, drizzly, then rainy but the Weston Library was as good as ever and we had lots of time to talk. A more local trip took me to badminton at the height of the snowfall. "This is crazy," I was thinking as I drove at 15mph, slowing down for junctions, trying not to use the brakes and turning corners very carefully. But I needed to play badminton after more than two weeks off, and there wasn't anything like the amount of snow that was forecast, and by the end of the evening it was already sleet and slush.

Cousin M and her son visited from Seattle en route to Spain, and we all met at Maternal Manor and caught up with family history and current goings on, followed by an excellent trip to the Royal Academy of Music in London for a student performance of Trial by Jury. My enlightened music teacher at junior school was quite a character, completely indifferent to the musical limitations of under-11's. He encouraged composition, percussion and harp players (as well as your traditional instruments) and we even had a school orchestra. Together with one of the other teachers he also staged productions of Gilbert & Sullivan operettas. I still remember them - Pirates of Penzance was one, and Trial by Jury was another, where I was chosen as understudy for the part of the Usher. It's now FIFTY years later but some of it was spookily familiar. Anyway, I enjoyed it a great deal.

The official process of moving on from Lola Towers has started with a visit from a representative of an Estate Agent. She found the property bigger than she expected, called the garden 'generous' (which it has never been to me), and showed me comparisons with other local properties that she could find. We agreed on the ballpark figure that might be asked, and the next stage will be a similar visit from a second Estate Agent representative.

Progress

Birmingham Museum and Art Gallery, December 2025

The third visit from Lee the plumber at Maternal Manor was supervised by Lola II. He continued to track the pipes under the kitchen floor and extended the trench towards the sink, and at last found a leak. Both Lola II and I greeted this news with great joy and the observation that we've never been so glad to discover a broken pipe. After a brief discussion of what to do next, we all agreed that the full length of the pipes should be uncovered, and thank goodness it was because a second leak was found further along. Lee replaced the whole section of pipe and lagged and protected it properly; now we're waiting for his report for insurance claim purposes. Meanwhile I took possession of the promised dehumidifier (which I'll take there next time I visit) which will remove as much of the water as possible before the trench is filled in, and then redecorating can start.

GRUHI has been going slowly but steadily. I managed to give away the tennis racquet via the Olio online platform, but nearly didn't. Olio seems to be used by young people, and the prospective recipient relied very heavily on WhatsApp to the extent that when he messaged me that he was outside the door and I didn't answer immediately, he considered going away again. I did see the message after a few minutes and went down to open the door, asking why he hadn't rung the doorbell. He seemed somewhat surprised at this suggestion. Make of that what you will.

Having lost so much weight (6kg now) I thought I'd revisit a bag of trousers that I grew out of but kept because I was particularly fond of them 40 years ago. They are all a similar size which is still considerably smaller than I am now, and I painfully resolved to part with them, with support from Lola II (who has been reading a book about decluttering). They and more surplus clothes have now gone to the clothes bin at the supermarket, to Action 21 along with a box of books and some random household ephemera, and a blanket and old duvet have gone to the The Dog's Trust after Guide Dogs said they didn't want them. I haven't yet advertised the big bookcase, the electronic piano and the tenor saxophone.

My Diabetes Prevention Programme coach is very encouraging, but still highly unsatisfactory in terms of providing anything other than someone to be accountable to. I ignore her advice which mostly consists of suggesting that I eat more. This advice is clearly intended to help moderate blood sugar spikes, but I am focussing more on calories and portion sizes which seems to be working so far in terms of weight. I have asked for a repeat blood test but the doctor has told me to wait until the end of February, so I'll have to wait some more to find out if all my efforts have made any difference in that respect.

There's been plenty of exercise, particularly over one 24-hour period when I did an hour with my personal trainer, went to Coventry for a gig where I stood for 1½ hours then danced my socks off for 1½ hours then had to run for the train, and next morning joined my U3A ramblers for 2½ hours. That was all quite tiring, but the gig was fantastic and I picked up the dehumidifier at the end of the walk, so worth it. My Monday badminton was slightly difficult, however, when they put on the regular end-of-year competition and I came very definitely in last place. Not so long ago (or so it seems) I was in contention for the winning position. My self-esteem was somewhat restored when I played in a match with my Thursday badminton ladies which we won.

The kitchen roof at Lola Towers started to leak during one of the recent storms, and quite a lot of water came through. It hasn't repeated this performance, but I invited the roofer recommended by Glf to have a look at it, and he came back the very next day to fix it. Standing on the roof with a cup of tea we had a very interesting conversation about the lack of young people interested in following the sort of trades that are needed, and then we talked about the painting I need at the front of the house. It gave me a good deal of food for thought around whether I want a cash trader working from a ladder or someone in a business working from a scaffold tower. The answer is now much clearer, especially after my experience of the dangerous pointing work.

Water trouble again

Maternal Manor, December 2025

The situation in mum's kitchen at the Maternal Manor is not good. There has been evidence of damp rising in the walls for years, which we started by covering up, then more recently we invited a reliable plumber to have a look. It wasn't serious, he said, and he recommended continuing to cover it up, despite the skirting coming away from the wall and tiles lifting. But the meter showed water consumption was increasing, and it was time to act.

Lola II made enquiries with the insurer and Thames Water and identified a WaterSafe approved firm, which turned out to be Lee. After fixing an unrelated issue with the upstairs toilet cistern he poked about under floorboards and in cupboards trying to guess where the water was coming from. On the second visit he pointed out that the unplastered wall under the sink was also showing evidence of damp, and measured the loss of pressure in various parts of the pipework to try and narrow down the possibilities of where a leak might be. Results were sadly inconclusive, so in the end we had to agree that he would dig up the kitchen floor following the pipework from the stopcock to the sink, as this seems the most likely source. The layer beneath the floor is clearly saturated, but so far no actual break in the pipes has been found.

The plumber mentioned that once the leak is fixed it will be necessary to remedy the damp using a dehumidifier. I started casting around via some of the different trading arenas I'm part of, but the one that seems to be the most reliable is my U3A walking group. I was relating the story of the kitchen leak to the person I was walking, who then revealed that she had an unwanted dehumidifier and would be happy to pass it on. [Update also from the walking group: sadly the surgeon who had volunteered to go to the West Bank had a very unpleasant interrogation at the border and was refused entry by the Israeli authorities.]

Meanwhile at Lola Towers I have finished cleaning and arranging UJ's room and have moved back in, trying to take only what I need in an attempt to lose a bit more stuff.  It is taking longer than I anticipated. I advertised a glass-topped coffee table on Freegle, Nextdoor, Olio and eBay (in that order). Olio was the successful channel, and the lucky recipient also took away my corner table (but didn't want the tennis racquet or the large bookcase). I have reconfigured the bedroom I've been using for three years and it's now ready to accept single guests, which is more convenient (and warmer) than making up the sofabed in the Auditorium. That will continue to be used for double guests, however.

Conveniently I did have a single guest staying on Saturday night - Mr M was passing through, and he was able to provide a very valuable service: that of photographer. For I discovered that my passport, although not expiring until April 2026, will not permit me to travel to Europe for skiing at the end of January. It is quite straightforward to apply for a new one online, except that a passport photograph conforming to strict standards is needed, which I am unable to provide without assistance.

Mr M provided a second valuable service in that he told me how to find out what my PIN is on a new credit card that I've received. For these services and because it is only humane I turned the central heating on for the duration of his visit (and a little bit longer). For my experiment in heating myself instead of the house is fine in the Office (fan heater), Auditorium (heated blanket) and bedroom (hot water bottle) but the kitchen floor is icy. My latest idea is to buy slippers with a more insulating sole.

Getting stuff done

Random picture of delicious lunch in Gloucester, September 2025

After leaving mum I had a full weekend back home with three Buddhist events and a birthday party, and then drove south again so that I could accompany mum for a medical procedure on Monday (which went very well). There was a badminton match to be played on Monday evening, and the person who was supposed to play found herself unable to do so, so back I drove for that. I was relieved when Tuesday came and I didn't have anywhere that I needed to be until the evening.

I started with loads of laundry that has been generated by UJ's departure, and then investigated her room, which was in a fairly good state but needs a bit of work - one of the roman blinds was torn and there's lots of dust in the corners. I was thinking of moving back in to that bedroom, but it really is very cold indeed. Having said that, most of the house is quite cold at the moment. Another lovely empty spacious day on Wednesday (I really think I might be getting better at not filling my diary) and I took down the torn blind and made a start on mending it while listening to an audio book, then went to the cinema. Good times.

Finished mending the blind on Thursday. The lining is paper thin and tears at the slightest pressure, probably due to being exposed to the sun for about 20 years. I took down the curtains for washing and managed to get the blind back up again, then made a start on cleaning the windows and wardrobe. Lots more cleaning will keep me busy for several days, but I took a break to investigate heated blankets so I can warm myself rather than the house, which should be a whole lot cheaper. Ordered one for collection tomorrow.

Friday: my regular U3A morning walk and lunch in pub, which I've missed for a few weeks due to weather and everything else. The person who gave me details of recommended decorator was sad to hear that after said decorator visited and I found him utterly delightful, he has turned down the job on the basis of being 'too far away'. However, another walker immediately stepped in with a replacement recommendation. Aside from good walks this group is invaluable for local recommendations (the auction house for dad's philatelic collection was another that came out of this group). After lunch I collected the heated blanket and tried it out immediately; great success on the warmth-providing front but a bit more velvety than in the illustration. This makes it quite slippery as well as difficult to manipulate by someone who finds velvet unpleasant, but I will persevere.

Saturday: Continued to clean up UJ's room, turned mattress, replaced cleaned curtains, furniture polish in abundance, advertised unwanted glass coffee table and tennis racquet - not a hint of interest other than the usual speculative enquiries within a minute that never amount to anything. Sewed on coat buttons, reattached worn string on cord in shower room operating fan but need new weight to hang on the bottom. In the evening there was a fundraising Indian meal at the Buddhist Centre in Birmingham, and I ate so much that I didn't eat anything for most of Sunday, when I did more jobs before an afternoon with my fellow team members supporting the local Buddhist group. In the evening I went to one of the National Theatre Live screenings before driving south to mum's in order to be there when the plumber turned up again at 9 a.m. to carry on trying to work out where all the water is coming from in the kitchen.

A week in London

Natural History Museum, London, November 2025

Some time ago I decided that Lola Towers is too big for me. I've lived there for nearly 24 years, and although it's just the way I want it now and it's also in the perfect location, I'm tired of the responsibility of maintaining both it and the garden it comes with. I've kept it in good condition (at least since Mr A departed) but still there's the roof, the boiler, the shower, the paintwork, and everything else that demands attention, let alone the bills for heating a large Victorian house.

Following a logical train of thought with many considerations both of lifestyle and of finance, I talked to mum about the possibility of moving in with her. She seemed to like the idea, so this has been the additional motivation for GRUHI, for giving notice to UJ, and now for an experimental week's stay with mum. Lola Towers bid me farewell during Storm Claudia by letting water into the kitchen through a different part of the ceiling. I put down a towel, left a message for UJ, and set off anyway. It can wait until I get back.

While in London I shopped around for Buddhist communities. The nearest is actually the largest Centre in the UK, the London Buddhist Centre in Bethnal Green. Coming from one of the smallest groups to the largest might not be my best option in terms of getting to know people, so during the week I attended the Saturday morning group at the North London Centre, the Tuesday evening group in Hertford, and the Wednesday evening group in Chelmsford (as well as the Thursday evening meeting at the LBC). None stood out as the perfect venue so I'll keep my options open for the time being, and visit them all again another time.

Apart from Buddhist activity I've obviously spent some quality time with mum - we have cooked (she has been very complementary about the results) and watched a bit of TV together, and I taught her a new card game (after about three rounds she was already beating me). There are also all the jobs that need doing, including sorting out confusing emails, the change in mobile phone contract that Tesco unilaterally imposed, getting rid of a lot more of the paperwork accumulated by dad and generally making myself useful.

On Monday morning I took myself off to the British Museum. I feel such a philistine when I say that it no longer appeals the way it once did. I visited the exhibition about China from prehistory to modern day, and then I looked at the Egyptian mummies, and even though it was OK and mildly interesting, my pleasure was frequently interrupted by the thought that most of the contents of the cases were acquired from indigenous people without their permission, let's say.

In the afternoon I met Lola II and in the evening we met up with Mr M for my last 60th birthday meal (of three), this time at a Venezuelan restaurant. It took me four months to book the first one, and this one took place just ten days short of a year after that. I like to make birthdays last.

On Wednesday we had two notable events. First, a plumber arrived to help us trace a water leak, and by the way fixed the upstairs toilet flush (hooray). The water leak still needs more investigation, unfortunately. Second, two buyers visited to assess the huge collection of books that dad amassed, offered a frankly pitiful amount of money and took them all away. After cleaning the shelves we moved photo albums, cards and ornaments from the dining room to make the room look less bereft, and on my next visit I brought over some books from Lola Towers that I mean to keep.

On Thursday I planned a day out at the Natural History Museum, mainly because Mr MXF and BL2 suggested meeting there for lunch. I've been going there since I was a child, and while some of the exhibits are carefully curated and looked after (a corridor of minerals, endangered birds, the museum's 'Treasures'), the whole experience gave the impression of being just a little bit tired, with missing light bulbs, thick layers of dust and touch screens not working. 

The dinosaur exhibit might once have been cutting edge, but they have filled a gloriously decorated Victorian room with girders and spotlights and made the actual exhibits quite hard to see and the labelling hard to read - one case had white text on an orange background with no lighting and I have no idea what was there. The café staff were probably doing their best, but apparently when an order for decaf tea is taken at the till it isn't passed on (they had to take my receipt away to fulfil my order).

Mr MXF and BL2 were on good form - Mr MXF has succumbed to his genetic heritage and had a mild heart attack, so now he has a stent and a cupboard full of pills but is in good health otherwise. BL2 is enjoying retirement and has discovered U3A. I hope to see more of them next year.

And the saga of UJ as a lodger is at an end - she has finally moved out, although she missed the first flight she had booked, she was hoovering at 1 a.m. and her belongings took a little longer to leave the house, the last few boxes being picked up the following day. I am looking after a few lamps, vases and plants until she returns to collect them. She has returned to Ukraine for Christmas and New Year and intends to come back to the UK next year and find her own place. 

Christmas at Lola Towers

Worcestershire, October 2024

Aside from watching a huge number of films and reading those two stupid annoying Connie Willis books, I've done a few other, more sociable things during the festive break.

We had a badminton tournament, and I have come to terms with not being in the top two or three players any more. I continue to be exercised by Muscles, my Personal Trainer, and he has gradually increased the intensity of his demands, but never beyond my capability. Sister D says that this is the heart of her experience of a Personal Trainer - never being asked to do something you can't. I do feel, however, that I inhabit a body that is significantly less able than it used to be, and which constantly reminds me that I'm not as young as I was.

The U3A walking group has finished until next year, but three of us were going to assemble for the board games group until the host sent a sad message that the session was cancelled - his wife had a stroke. She is a lovely woman who is not in the least interested in board games but feeds us tea and biscuits and proudly showed us the picture she was painting as a Christmas present for her son.

And on Christmas Eve I donated blood, which seems a very Christmassy thing to do. I spent all of Christmas Day on my own and didn't even go out, but had a lovely time doing exactly what I liked. On Boxing Day I organised a walk with the Buddhists (seven of us turned up for that), and in the afternoon I went over for tea with the Man Who Remains Nameless. You seriously wouldn't be able to tell that less than four weeks ago he'd had a hip replacement. He says that there are certain movements that he needs to avoid, like twisting, or bending more than 90 degrees at the hip, but otherwise he just seems to be walking normally. It's astonishing.

I did have a belated Christmas dinner with my friends in Nottingham on the weekend after Christmas. Complete with presents, dog-walking and crackers (and therefore hats, jokes and novelties), we had a great time.

The launch of GRUHI

July 2023

I've managed to start the huge project to try and free myself of all the accumulated stuff in my house that might come in useful one day, or that reminds me of something or someone, or is broken or just needed to be out of the way so it found its way to the loft, or that is nice to look at but taking up space and accumulating dust. So much Stuff. Just looking around from where I'm sitting: a silver desk clock with the second hand broken off. A small plastic dinosaur. An English dictionary and Thesaurus. A non-functional electric blanket. Three French language course books. And mum has also been passing me things that she no longer needs.

I don't want it all to end up in landfill, and ideally I'd like to find new owners who would appreciate the items. As with the LTRP I feel that to maintain momentum I need to apply an acronym. Get Rid of Unwanted Household Items seems appropriate: GRUHI. Sounds suitably gruesome to signify the tedious and difficult nature of the job and yet with a jolly little hiccup at the end which is the joy when it is accomplished.

Anyway, the first item to achieve the GRUHI status is my old iPod, which I have listed on eBay along with various compatible items - the iPod speaker docking station and assorted cables. The auction ended on Sunday and the iPod sold; I relisted the docking station and received one bid; the other items aren't even getting any views, so how will I get rid of those?

Leamington has a number of local initiatives as well as branches of national initiatives, which is one of the reasons I like to live here. LETS is a local trading community where the currency is 'Oaks' and people trade services rather than goods - giving lifts, swapping plants, make and mend sessions, recommendations for tradespeople and helping with any sort of household jobs. I've been a member for some time but haven't actually offered or asked for help. Leamington also has a monthly 'Repair Café' where people can take items that need repairing, and I have used that - they have extended the life of my camping chairs and a shopping bag.

Apparently Leamington LETS is represented at the monthly Repair Café. They have said that I might bring some GRUHI goods and see if anyone will take them off my hands - either the visitors, or maybe the people doing the repairs. That's all very interesting for the future, but the second Leamington Film Festival was about to take place and I needed to sort out the door to my toilet, which is dragging on the threshold and would be in danger of damage at the hands of multiple strangers pulling and pushing at it. So I put out a request via LETS, and who should respond but one of my U3A board game friends?

So he came over and we have improved the state of the door - I wouldn't say it's fixed but it's certainly much better. And he stayed for a cup of tea, and I told him about the Film Festival and sent him the link and he came to two of the films, which was very nice. And when I was out with my U3A walking group I mentioned my new project, and they told me about a company in Warwick that might be interested in dad's stamps - I haven't yet had time to do anything about that yet but it could happen soon.

And there are many charity shops in Leamington, and one of my Buddhist friend volunteers in two different charity shops in Kenilworth, and there's the shop at the tip, so many other ways to take forward my GRUHI initiative. It's now mid-September and I think it would be helpful to have some kind of time-based target for what I might achieve. Difficult to imagine what that might be at the moment - maybe I could go round the house listing everything to get rid of by the end of the year?

Pie

Tiratanaloka, September 2022

There's a distinct lack of interesting and/or blogworthy things going on in my life, which is very pleasant for my life but a challenge to my blogging mojo. Writing about a new vacuum cleaner was quite a low point, but the bar may have to drop further this time.

I made a vegan lemon meringue pie. Easy to replace fat with coconut oil/non-dairy spread, lemon curd thickened with cornflour, and I tried aqua faba - the liquid surrounding tinned chickpeas - as a replacement for egg white meringue. It was certified as delicious by Lola II and mum, although mum found the lemon curd a bit sharp. 

Sister D and Lola II visited Lola Towers to provide valuable assistance in carrying out some of my projects. I am gradually emptying the loft of its non-essential contents, which includes a shelf of folders from my university course in the 1980's. Sister D kindly separated out the sheets that could be re-used for printing so the rest could be recycled, which allowed me to detach myself from the process rather than getting caught up in unhelpful thoughts relating to that time of my life. Meanwhile, Lola II photographed the spotlights that have been replaced in the kitchen and listed them on local marketplace websites. I was contacted very quickly by a man who, very unusually in my experience, not only didn't try to renegotiate the price but actually turned up and collected them when he said he would.

There was also a visit to mum and dad, where useful work was done (mostly relating to money and finances) but we completely missed the clinic appointment that I was supposed to take mum to. Unusual for both of us to be so forgetful! Anyway, it was rebooked and took place without me, so that's a good result.

I've completed my tax return, and made inroads into the job that Mr MXF wants done (all about availability and types of HDR [High Dynamic Range] in UK media). And that's about it.

The new Hoover is a Shark

Knepp, June 2022

Sharknado has arrived at Lola Towers - a modern vacuum cleaner with half the power consumption of the previous one, and I filled its whole cylinder with a single pass through the house. Admittedly it's not a huge cylinder, but I wouldn't be surprised if I picked up a similar amount if I could be bothered to run it round again. So that's been fun, especially unpacking it and fitting it all together - all the bits come together with very satisfying clicks, and allow various unclickings to empty the cylinder and to use it in different modes. It's also a very pleasing shade of purple. UJ received her formal training on Saturday, and the part for the old machine also arrived and fitted perfectly, so that's working again and now I have to decide what to do with it.

I can't remember which -lf I'm up to. Flf maybe? So Flf the electrician and his apprentice sidekick came to replace all the spotlights in the kitchen. Back when I was remodelling I was persuaded to use sealed unit lights, which were difficult to replace until they became completely unavailable. They've all been replaced now with units containing a simple bulb, and we'll put that mistake down to inexperience. Flf and sidekick were very communicative and efficient, and even complimented me on the music playing, so that wins them extra points.

In other news - well, there isn't really any. UJ has gone home for five weeks, I've been south to see mum and dad and north to see H+B, played badminton including losing a match (but not losing as badly as we expected), led our Buddhist group for an evening, and been given a new mission (should I choose to accept it) from Mr MXF. Not that I've started on it; I always regret not recording our conversations but I am definitely intending to do something about it soon.

Back home

Biddulph Grange, August 2022

My four-week period of volunteering ended with a tea break. Several people had checked to make sure I was leaving after the tea break, so I was pretty sure that some sort of celebration was planned. I arrived to find everybody I'd worked with or been connected with around a table containing crisps and snacks, and I was given a card from everyone and another from one particular person, and then they did this thing called 'rejoicing in merit', which is when somebody highlights nice things about you. These Buddhists really know how to put on a leaving do.

Since then I've been mulling over the differences between living and working in a Buddhist environment and what I'm like at home. Here at home I don't have much structure to my life, just a list of things needing to be done that constantly hangs over me. There at the retreat centre I worked during the day and had evenings to myself, lots of structure and no list. But without the list I feel I might become too disorganised and forget things that are actually quite important. Also, for about a week I've been having such trouble sleeping through the night, being wide awake in the small hours and then being too tired to get up early for meditation. So I'm not meditating, which I think makes me feel a little more unsteady.

Anyway, in the past week I've dealt with the backlog of emails, talked to the water engineer that visited mum and dad and taken a call from Thames Water about fixing the leak, looked into NHS Continuing Care (don't ask), scanned my teeth for the orthodontist, mowed the lawn, took 10 bags of garden waste to the tip, and took a camping chair to the local Repair Cafe where it was mended with glue rather than the rivets I had hoped for. 

With friends who visited over the weekend I went to a cracking gig featuring the Tom Robinson Band and The Undertones - all these musicians are older than us (Tom Robinson is 73!!) but with at least double the energy that we could muster. Next morning they (my friends not the bands) took it upon themselves to help repair one of my bar stools and the door to the hall, because both of these were demonstrating irritating defects that affected them personally. They declined however to address the issue of the door to the shower room - fixing that will take more than friendly goodwill, gaffer tape and a screwdriver.

With the friends gone I finally turned to house cleaning, only to find that the hoover was out of action (again, don't ask). What this meant was that all and more of the time I would have spent hoovering were spent on the Internet trying to work out how to either fix it or buy a new machine, and I think I've ended up doing both. Now there's just my Buddhism homework on the list above the tax return...