Two years

24 February 2024, Lillington church

Saturday marked the two year anniversary of the invasion of Ukraine, and a service was held in a local church. The tone was broadly Christian, and a few people contributed their thoughts, poems, songs and dance. UJ was one of the people who spoke for a few minutes about her experience, and read a poem. I'm glad that I went but it wasn't all that pleasant, partly because the row in front of me contained about six children who didn't stop fidgeting and talking the whole time. Also, there was a bit too much about God, who clearly doesn't have much interest in Ukraine, nor other parts of the world for that matter. Or perhaps, like Brexit, without God's involvement it would be worse.

The local woman who has been organising in Warwick District on behalf of the Ukrainian population from the start - helping them learn English, find schools for their children, apply for housing and lots more - is still working hard in that capacity. Most refugees have now left their hosts to live independently; UJ is the exception in that respect, but I'm happy to have her and I think she's also content to stay. The local organiser had a hand in arranging the service, and invited ITV to come and film. After the main service the cameraman arranged a repeat of a couple of the performances: a man accompanying his daughters on his guitar, a child reciting a poem and another child singing and dancing. He also interviewed UJ and another woman, and some of all this was broadcast on ITV news in the evening.

From this event, and from a subsequent Buddhist meeting, it is clear that UJ is sparing me much of the trauma that she is experiencing - being separated from her family and friends, some of whom have been conscripted into the Ukrainian army, and no doubt others who are wounded or have even been killed. She is, understandably, angry and filled with hate. I am glad that despite this she seems to manage to enjoy life in the UK. For example, last Sunday when her train was cancelled so she couldn't join other Ukrainians for a hike, she went to the British Museum. This weekend I am away, but my neighbour has invited her to join her for a few things.

There seems no end in sight to this or to other conflicts and wars, and the human suffering inflicted is more than I can contemplate. So I don't contemplate it, not until it is brought to my attention in this personal way. I can do no more than try to embody love and compassion, because immersing myself in the reality of war and politics will help nobody and will destroy me.

So far in February

Adhisthana, May 2023

Lots of stuff since I last wrote, but none of it worthy of more meaningful consideration than a series of bullet points (except perhaps the last, but that's all it's getting).

• I visited my regular dental hygienist on her last day of work at the practice, and was happy to show her the good results of all the treatment I've been having. She was genuinely delighted and offered me a hug. I've never been hugged at the dentist before, so that's a first.
• A call to renew acquaintance with Mr MXF and a new job that involves testing some training materials he's developed. I broke the system within seven minutes simply by uploading a picture of a cake, and he thanked me for finding a weakness he'd never have thought of.
• Film recommendation: All Of Us Strangers, which I went to with UJ. She can cope well when there are subtitles but not so much in the cinema or with accents, so she missed one of the key plot points. I loved this film even more than Poor Things which I also saw with her and which was more of a spectacle and less nuanced. She preferred Poor Things, maybe because it was easier to understand despite being Mad.
• Buddhism: a morning at the Birmingham Centre as well as the usual Tuesday evenings, where we welcomed a visitor from Adhisthana (aka Triratna HQ, the retreat centre where I have been volunteering) and I realised how much I miss having an Order Member here so I can ask those tricky questions. I'm delighted that he'll be coming for two more weeks.
• The music group has started again with a few good arrangements as well as a couple of tedious pop songs. Each month I sigh at having committed to this before setting off anyway, and return with a spring in my step having thoroughly enjoyed myself and wondering how I might fit in some more clarinet and sax playing, and conclude that I'd definitely have to give up something else.
• Shrove Tuesday pancake mask competition - last year was my first attempt at this, but this year the theme was a more difficult one. I managed to put in an entry though. Judging is on 2nd March.
• U3A walking group - I'm enjoying this a great deal, despite Friday's walk being a lot more muddy than expected which made the going a bit tough. The leader slipped over and cut his hand quite badly on barbed wire, another person complained a little too often about the mud, and I accidentally opened a conversation about Brexit that perhaps wasn't appropriate, but we all survived. The U3A board games group is good too.
• Badminton - a match on Thursday left me a bit achy and tired before the difficult walk on Friday. I always end up trying harder and stretching more for a match compared with a club night, and I'm definitely not as young as I was. A couple of times I've left before the club night has ended, which my younger self would have found inconceivable. Still, I'll carry on playing until I can't play any more because walking is good exercise but nowhere near as much fun as swatting a shuttlecock in a big room.
• Visiting parents - the downstairs shower room conversion is going well and looks very nice, although the basin has accidentally been installed about 10cm higher than it should have. What with everyone in the family being short and  in some cases getting shorter this needs to be remedied. Mum and I picked out a new bathroom cabinet, and I put a couple of things no longer needed onto Freecycle.
• The tenth Random Chairs in a Darkened Room Film Festival hosted by Mr M and Lola II took place at the weekend, with six of the eight films being chosen by myself and another friend. Best film (in my opinion): Calvary (2014). It was the usual splendid event with many visitors, lots of food, ice creams and popcorn, wonderful trailers and shorts before the main screening, and I was given a shiny badge to wear designating my status as Guest Curator.

What I've been reading

Seeing Voices
by Oliver Sacks

"This book begins with the history of deaf people in the 18th century, the often outrageous ways in which they have been treated in the past, and their continuing struggle for acceptance in a hearing world. And it examines the visual language of the deaf - Sign - which has only recently been recognized fully as a language linguistically complete, rich, and as expressive as any spoken language."

Not as much fun as I hoped - his books on his neurological patients and their conditions are much more accessible than this and, dare I say it, more entertaining. This is academic with the entertaining stuff only in the footnotes. It does make me want to learn more about Sign language though.

Politics on the Edge
by Rory Stewart

narrated by the Author

"Over the course of a decade from 2010, Rory Stewart went from being a political outsider to standing for prime minister, before being sacked from a Conservative Party that he had come to barely recognise. Stewart emerged battered but with a profound affection for his constituency of Penrith and the Border, and a deep direct insight into the era of populism and global conflict."

I chose this because I've become a keen follower of the podcast where Rory Stewart (ex-Conservative) and Alastair Campbell (ex-Labour) have the kind of conversations about current affairs that I wish were the norm throughout politics. In the final section of the book he describes his part in the debate preceding Boris Johnson becoming Prime Minister. I wouldn't have watched that debate, and his description horrifies me. The contemptible behaviour of politicians continues as they declare, unchallenged, that black is white just because they say so, and integrity and intelligence go unrewarded while corruption and incompetence are honoured with a place in the House of Lords. I despair.

The Reader
by Bernhard Schlink

translated by Carol Brown Janeway

"For 15-year-old Michael Berg, a chance meeting with an older woman leads to far more than he ever imagined. The woman in question is Hanna, and before long they embark on a passionate, clandestine love affair which leaves Michael both euphoric and confused."

A short book, easy to read, which was made into a memorable film. I had forgotten the twist that comes half way through, and thought it was pretty good and written in a very understated and real way that made it seem true despite being fictional.

The Code Book
by Simon Singh

"From Mary, Queen of Scots, trapped by her own code, to the Navajo Code Talkers who helped the Allies win World War II, to the incredible (and incredibly simple) logistical breakthrough that made Internet commerce secure, The Code Book tells the story of the most powerful intellectual weapon ever known: secrecy."

Another book I had read before that didn't disappoint. Interesting to be reminded of the state of play twenty years ago, and the predictions for Internet traffic, e-commerce and online activity that have become reality.

Remembering Babylon
by David Malouf

narrated by Paul English

"In the mid-1840s a thirteen-year-old British cabin boy, Gemmy Fairley, is cast ashore in the far north of Australia and taken in by aborigines. Sixteen years later he moves back into the world of Europeans, among hopeful yet terrified settlers who are staking out their small patch of home in an alien place."

I'm not really sure what the point of this book is. The story seemed quite flat, I didn't understand any of the nuance (if there was any), and maybe it was because of the audio format? So there was no satisfaction in reading, no understanding, no comedy or tragedy, nor any emotion at all. Strange, because the description above holds so much promise, but none is realised.

Skiing and skydiving

Les Arcs 2000, January 2024

I'm still a bit childishly overexcited with all that's gone on since the last blog post, but let's start at the beginning. The first thing was a weekend Buddhist retreat for people who are part of small groups like ours. I always come away with new ideas and enthusiasm and this time was no exception, with the added complication that I'm pretty sure the decaffeinated tea was mislabelled. So: extra energy during the retreat, and a stonking caffeine withdrawal migraine on Tuesday.

I've been to see the parents two or three times, and the shower conversion has been started by very pleasant workmen. Mum had a nasty experience with pain followed by a trip to A&E - she rates paramedics very highly, A&E doctors not so much. But when I saw her this week she was dosed up and pain-free. We have the usual long list of jobs to be done - liaison with neighbours over garden fences, reliable carers to be found, a wound that needs to be reviewed by the GP... I was impressed by her stamina given that I can only be there for a few hours and we work pretty hard.

Then there was a week skiing in France with JW and JD and their son and his friends and our friends - we were a group of 9 altogether, and split up during the day mostly according to skiing ability and during the evening mostly according to age. We travelled by train - Eurostar and TGV - and funicular and bus, and the weather was sunny and dry except for one afternoon. The resort could do with a bit of fresh snow, but on the whole it was wonderful. I used my new hat with attached crocheted beard (thank you Lola II) and got no reaction from anyone. Perhaps it looked a bit too realistic.

On the day we came back there were UK rail strikes, so those trying to get back to Cambridge had a bit of trouble - two managed to find a train and a bus replacement service, two decided to stay in London for an extra night. Luckily I only had to go back to Lola II and Mr M's house, because the next day we had arranged to do Indoor Skydiving as part of Lola II's Belated Birthday Events, postponed from her actual birthday in 2020 due to Circumstances.

Indoor Skydiving is done in a large tube with a huge fan at the bottom blowing air upwards. We watched a very entertaining training video and signed a waiver beforehand, but any shoulder injury is enough to rule you out, so sadly Mr M with his frozen shoulder couldn't take part. Luckily he agreed to take pictures and video, so we have a wonderful record of what happened. There were six of us, and we were kitted out with helmet, goggles, flying suit and (optional) earplugs. Our instructor Ellie checked that we knew all the hand signals for straightening and bending our legs, keeping our chin up, and relaxing. Then we filed into the tube.

It was one of the most exciting and wonderful things I've ever done. Up to that point the closest thing to flying that I've done has been skiing, and we know that I have always wanted to fly - like a bird, not in a plane. Each of our two 'flights' were only one minute long, and some people had a bit of trouble getting their balance and needed a lot of support from the instructor, but watching the video back both Lola II and I were among the best. We both took the option of being taken up higher in the tube for the second flight, which seemingly had to be done by a different instructor.

As I'm writing this it's two days later and I'm still grinning from ear to ear whenever I think about it, and I've watched the video many times. Our nephew and his wife even signed up on the spot for a future flight, but I've had a look and there isn't a convenient option that's local to me. If Mr M's shoulder recovers and he wants to try it, Lola II and I will definitely join him, especially as they are very good at finding discounts to make it more affordable.